My Parental Unit came over today for a Nice Visit. After their arrival, announced by Dad intoning, "Someone could trip over that!" they made themselves at home. Dad spent 25 minutes in the bathroom, during which time Mom pawed through all of my belongings--I hid my wine, condoms, vibrator, and Obama cap, but forgot about the potato chips, and they were the most controversial--all those trans fats!
We went to Thai Town for lunch. Oddly enough, for people who think that salt and pepper is "too spicy" and lasagna is "ethnic food," both of my parents like Thai! Dad always gets sweet-n-sour pork, so he might as well be eating in a Chinese restaurant. Which may account for the fact that he all of a sudden bellowed, "ARE THEY TALKING CHINESE?" "Um...no, Dad...that would be Thai..." "IT SOUNDS LIKE CHINESE! HOW DO YOU KNOW THEY'RE NOT TALKING CHINESE!" "Um...because they work here and they're wearing freakin' Thai Town aprons?"
Across from us there was another Adult Child of Parents. He was suffering through a litany of all the foods his parents consumed on a cruise ship which Did Not Agree With Them. At one point, we grinned in solidarity and cast rolled eyeballs at our respective Parental Units. We could've traded tables and our Parental Units probably wouldn't have noticed, and we wouldn't have improved our individual situations any.
At least this wasn't like the last time I had lunch with my parents, when Dad announced out of the blue that "Your mother and I haven't had intercourse in several years...."
And I wonder why I'm a social misfit???
Profit!
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Hey, remember when I trash picked a Steiff bear? Finally sold him for $100.
Why, if I do this every day, I'd have a career going!
7 years ago
2 comments:
See, now, did you ask for that Nice Young Man's phone number? I bet he's not into BDSM things.
Ohmigod, we were both with our parents! I would've been like soooo totally embarrassed to like go up to him!
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